Gina Jacobs informed her that her precious stillborn baby boy would receive a proper burial when he was delivered. It was a devastating lie…
Gina Jacobs realized she had been told a terrible lie decades after her precious stillborn baby boy was forever lost in a cardboard box. After being informed that Robert had been buried “with a nice lady” in a nearby cemetery for more than 50 years, Gina has been grieving for her for the past 50 years. The truth of what really happened, which Gina only discovered a couple of years ago, was horrendous – and happened to hundreds of other families.
If you had a stillborn child, you just had to get on with it, says Gina, 81, from Greasby, Merseyside. I never even saw my baby because he was taken away from me. He was put into a cardboard box and we were told that he would be buried with someone who was already being buried that day or the next day. Out of respect for the family, we never thought about it and never inquired as to where he was buried. That family appeared to be fictitious. We just knew he would be in one of the graves in Landican Cemetery in Birkenhead and for decades my late husband Jim and I would walk around the cemetery wondering ‘ Where is Robert? ‘”
Stillborn babies were taken from families before the 1980s, and their families were never informed of what had happened to them or where they were buried. Ever since that devastating day on February 3rd, 1969, when Gina gave birth to Robert, her third child after a daughter Karen and son David, she believed he had been looked after.
Then in 2022 she was watching a local BBC news report, during which a woman named Lilian Thorpe said she found her baby after similar circumstances. Gina credits Lilian for giving her the courage to search public burial records and eventually she found Robert’s exact resting place at Landican Cemetery in Birkenhead. But what Gina discovered was like a gut punch. Instead of being buried in a grave, many stillborn infants were buried in shared or mass graves – often in unconsecrated ground, with no plaque or marker and with the families given no information.
Robert was reunited with 62 more infants before being found. When Gina told local authorities, ‘ That can’t be right, he is with someone buried that day’, she was told, ‘ Oh, they told everybody that’. Gina, who has eight grandchildren, ten great grandchildren, and two great great grandchildren, is now assisting other mothers and fathers in finding their children. She says it has been joyous to be able to say “Your baby has been found” despite the fact that she almost every day hear depressing stories from traumatized parents all over the UK.
They wouldn’t let us see our baby, Gina, who worked in care and youth work. I missed even a glimpse. They stole that memory. No one saw any babies who had been living for a while. I have it in my dreams. We were all told the same thing, that our babies would be buried with a nice family, with their permission and a little blessing. It was all accepted by everyone. We were a generation that didn’t really challenge authority because we were so traumatized.
” They played on how vulnerable we were. Never did anyone give a reason for it. Although the word “” is a relatively new one, it has a lot of weight. The hospital staff didn’t know the truth either, I’ve spoken to midwives – they firmly believed it too. But those who brought that baby to the cemetery that day knew that they were telling us lies. Robert was transported from the hospital morgue to the local cemetery by my now-deceased husband in a cardboard box.
“People were struggling and the majority of these babies travelled on the bus to the cemetery in a dreadful cardboard box tied with string, on their dad’s knee. One man I know had to attach the box to his bicycle’s back. Another person was informed that “Hurry, you can catch the next bus.” And another poor man had rope marks on his hands because he had to carry a heavy full-term baby but he didn’t want to put the box on the ground”.
Gina adds: “Nobody consented to our babies going into what amounted to landfill for babies. That is not our intention. They are all unconsecrated, without any blessing, and the stillbirth register does not even permit a Christian name. We’ve named them unofficially, but when I have asked if they could be named on the register the answer is still no, because there’s no place for a name to be inserted. It’s terrible. A gravedigger has mentioned that Robert’s grave was sometimes left open for 15 months, as per what he’s heard. I’ve heard reports of babies being wrapped in plastic bags and left in dirty sheds until the grave was ready”.
Gina recalls the time of Robert’s birth and how Karen and David, her older children, were eager to bring the child home. When a stillborn child is born, she recalls “the terrible silence.” She says: “I remember Karen was talking to David and she said, ‘ I wish the baby hadn’t died, who’s that other bed for now? ‘ that “cut like a knife”
Gina has since started the Facebook group Gina’s Sleeping Babies Reunited, with help from friend Diana Williams, who got in touch early on and found her own little baby, John. Gina says: “Since discovering where Robert is in the cemetery, I have spoken to other women and it has led to me looking for hundreds of babies. My husband died 15 years ago never knowing where his son was because we were lied to.
” I found Robert because they gave me a map of the graves, it was so hard to find, a grave digger helped me. I was relieved to finally be able to locate him. I’ve now made the entire area nice and straight. If babies are found they can take their rightful place in their families. Unfortunately, not all babies can be found, sadly. We count ourselves fortunate. They have vanished and there are fears they were taken for medical research. “
Gina, who frequently runs for the school, says, “I have a lot of energy for my age, but it can all be very overwhelming.” She still rides her bicycle everywhere and still cares for the great grandchildren. A sibling is trying to find a sibling, or the fathers have passed away quite frequently. I know one woman whose baby has been found but she’s elderly and lives abroad now so she can’t visit the grave. I’ve promised to keep it looking good for her.
When you have to explain a baby’s location to others, it’s heartbreaking. I feel so responsible. I had the unwavering conviction that they could all be found when I embarked on this journey. But there are times when they can’t, which is terrible. However for those families who have now found their babies, they are overjoyed. They are able to pay tribute and travel there.
Gina, who lives with her second husband Arthur, has the backing of MPs in the Wirral and has already received the Wirral Award for supporting bereaved parents and helping them find their born asleep babies and establish new memorials. However, she and other parents want an official apology from the government.
The issue was raised during Prime Minister’s questions, but while then PM Rishi Sunak expressed sympathy, he stopped short of an apology. Wes Streeting, Secretary of State for Health and Social Care, has pledged to meet Gina and any others affected – Gina plans to show him letters from dozens of bereaved mothers. On November 4, Gina has organised a church service and blessings at Landican Cemetery, attended by local religious leaders including the Bishop of Chester, where names of the previously forgotten babies will be read out.
A Department of Health and Social Care spokesperson says: “Our sympathies are with all the families affected. This is appalling and should never have been allowed to happen. We expect all hospitals to act with compassion and transparency, providing as much information as possible to any parents seeking to understand what happened to their stillborn babies, no matter how long ago their loss happened.”
Gina asserts, “Robert has not passed away in vain. We are helping people who have been terribly wronged. We simply want some closure.
*APPEAL: If any UK university medical facilities are aware of any stillborn baby research that could help reunite families, please contact Gina’s Sleeping Babies Reunited on Facebook.
Source: Mirror
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