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Why women are such good liars!

By Bunmi Sofola

Most of us will probably admit to the occasional little white lie. But in fact, more than one in three people tell at least one lie every day.

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And it turns out that the fairer sex are the biggest fibbers of all. According to a survey, a shocking four in five women tell lies on a daily basis. Some women even admit to doing so as many as 30 times a day—the equivalent of twice every waking hour.

This compares with two out of five men who said they tended to tell lies every day. Fortunately, the picture is not as bleak as the statistics imply. People said they mainly shied away from telling the truth to avoid hurting other people’s feelings. The biggest reason they lied was to ‘make someone feel better’ (55 per cent|). This was followed by ‘to not get into trouble’ (32 per cent) and one in four put it down to the fact that ‘life is complicated.’ ‘Proving a point’ and ‘saving face’ were also common reasons to skirt around the truth.

Around 2,000 people were questioned for the poll commissioned by insurance company Privilege. Ad researchers found a common theme running through people’s lies. No one likes to leave a plateful of food when invited to a dinner party, and ‘saying you enjoyed a friend or relative’s cooking’ when you might not have was the number one reason for lying (42 per cent). People also commonly fib about their job, their salary or their weight. And they regularly pretend to share a hobby with someone they are trying to impress.

However, perhaps fortunately, most of our lies are relatively harmless. Around 80 per cent said they only told a lie when it would not seriously hurt anyone—although one in ten said a small fib they told had ended up hurting someone they were close to. The research also revealed that the most popular place to lie is ‘at home’. Work and job interviews were the next most popular, followed by social media. But the truth is most likely to be told in a court or doctor’s surgery.

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As for who we are most likely to lie to, friends are top of the list (30 per cent), followed closely by work colleagues and partners (around one in four) and then children. Interestingly, it is in middle-age rather than in youth that we are most likely to lie—46 was the average age of people who admitted regularly telling lies.’ Dan Simson, from Privilege, said: ‘Encouragingly, this has shown us that even though we can be guilty of telling the odd porky, on the whole, we are likely to tell the truth when it matters.

Yola: From 'house screamer' to four-time Grammy nominee

“It’s unreal. Surreal. I was crying intermittently for 24 hours when I found out.”

British singer Yola says her phone and Insta messages “blew up” when she realised she had four nominations for the 2020 Grammys.

Alongside Radiohead’s Thom Yorke, that’s the most of any British artist including big names like Lewis Capaldi and Ed Sheeran.

She’s up for Best New Artist with other breakout acts of the year including Lil Nas X, Lizzo and Billie Eilish.

However, despite being nominated in a new talent category, the singer says it’s been a long journey to get where she is now.

“It’s been a struggle,” she tells Radio 1 Newsbeat, backstage before her recent gig in London.

Yola describes herself as a “genre-fluid artist” who takes soul, rock ‘n’ roll, country and pop, and blends it with sounds of the 1960s and 1970s.

What emerged from that musical melting pot was Walk Through Fire – her debut album which was released in February.

“When people care about what you’re doing for yourself, it’s very validating. I had those times when I was told no-one wanted to hear me or they wanted to hear the person next to me. It hurt every time.”

Over the years, she’s gone through the highs and lows of the music industry.

‘Complete belief’

She was in the band Phantom Limb (under her full name Yolanda Quartey) but also experienced homelessness and slept on friends’ couches and mattresses.

She also had to deal with numerous people telling her she wouldn’t make it as a solo artist and to give up her dream.

To conquer it, she says took “complete belief” that she could be successful.

“I can sing a song. I can write a song. I have confidence in those two skills. If someone says they have a problem with that I can say they’re wrong – as clearly as night is night and day is day.”

Years before, she had a career as (what she calls) a “house screamer”, providing vocals on anthems such as Chase and Status’s Blind Faith and Duke Dumont’s Won’t Look Back.

She was a touring vocalist with Massive Attack and her samples were used on Chemical Brothers’ tracks. But that genre wasn’t her passion.

“I mean… you could wear an outfit looking like Ronald McDonald. But that doesn’t mean you want to dress like that all the time does it?”

Instead, to pursue the music she wanted to make, she went to the home of country music – Nashville. It’s a city which she says is “far more influential than a lot of people are aware.”

“When you go there to work and you say you’re a musician, people look at you like you just told them you’re a doctor. It’s serious business.”

Initially, Nashville was intimidating for her because there was “a legend in every studio”.

“It took me a little while to get over the fear thing. I really wasn’t embodying that stereotype of the strong black woman. Instead, I was the terrified black woman.”

She’s also been nominated in the Best Americana Album category for Walk Through Fire. The album received pretty glowing reviews when it was released, with one critic at NPR calling it the work “of an artist sure to stun audiences for years to come”.

It was produced by the Black Keys’ lead singer Dan Auerbach. Opening track, Faraway Look, is also nominated for Best Americana Roots Song and Best Americana Roots Performance.

Yola says her success is down to “a lot of work and a lot of figuring out who I am,” and reckons nobody should be happy being pigeonholed.

Asked what she says to the people who doubted her: “One… You’re a muppet. Two… you’re a muppet. And three… guess what you are!”

Now she’s making it big, Yola’s had messages from some of those who said she wouldn’t get anywhere.

“Everyone’s got short term memories,” she says.

“It’s insane but it’s conditioning. They don’t realise they’re sexist. They just don’t have any female friends or work with any females. They don’t realise they have cognitive bias on issues of race. They just don’t have any friends of colour.

“You don’t realise you have these problems until you end up having to call on them in some way, or call on their support… not even to do anything, just to not be down on you for trying to live your best life.

“That’s all any of us are trying to do… live our best darned lives.”

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Obasanjo lauds Hajia Shagaya

Olusegun Obasanjo

In what can be described as a rare expression of friendship, former President, Olusegun Obasanjo hosted a cosy party to celebrate the 60th birthday of billionaire business titan, Hajia Bola Shagaya. Obasanjo who was out of the country when the well-loved high society doyenne held a superlative birthday celebration in October decided to honour her with a special evening which was attended by very close friends and family members.

Held at Clear Essence California Spa and Wellness Resort, Ikoyi, Hajia Shagaya who is also an in-law of current Vice President, Prof. Yemi Osinbajo was all smiles throughout the occasion.


In a passionate speech, President Obasanjo described Hajia Shagaya as a remarkable woman and friend, who was close to his late wife, Stella, stood by her when he was imprisoned and was a pillar of support for her son, Muyiwa, when she died, almost single-handedly sponsoring the wedding of Muyiwa.

ISIL-linked group executes four hostages in Nigeria: NGO

Nigerian soldiers patrol the country’s northeastern region following an attack in October blamed on fighters belonging to the Islamic State West Africa Province (ISWAP) group [File: AFP]

Members of a group that pledged allegiance to the Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant (ISIL) have executed four Nigerian hostages held since July, the French aid group Action Against Hunger said on Friday.

The four victims were among the six hostages held by the armed fighters from the Islamic State West Africa Province (ISWAP) group in Nigeria, the Paris-based NGO said, adding that one of its staff and two drivers were among those killed.

“The armed group responsible for the kidnapping of humanitarian workers on July 18, have murdered four hostages,” the Action Against Hunger said in a statement that did not identify the victims. 

More:

Another of the hostages was killed in September.

The French aid group called for the immediate release of the last detained hostage, saying it is “extremely concerned and calls for the immediate release of its staff member, Grace, who remains in captivity.”

The six, an Action Against Hunger employee, two drivers and three health ministry personnel were kidnapped while delivering humanitarian aid to vulnerable people near the town of Damasak in Borno State.

Their driver was killed in the kidnap ambush carried out by ISWAP group, which is said to be a splinter group of the armed group, Boko Haram.

ISWAP fighters have repeatedly attacked military bases and previously targeted aid workers in northeast Nigeria.

“Action Against Hunger condemns these latest killings in the strongest terms and deeply regrets that its calls for the release of the hostages have not been acted upon,” the group said in its statement.

On Thursday ISWAP fighters killed 14 pro-government militia and a police officer in northeast Nigeria, militia leaders told AFP on Friday.

The militia was comprised of local hunters across the northeast along with the state funded Civilian Joint Task Force, an armed vigilante group.

The decade-long insurgency has killed 35,000 people and displaced around two million from their homes in northeast Nigeria.

The violence has now spread to neighbouring Niger, Chad and Cameroon, prompting a regional military coalition to fight the insurgents.

Source: Aljazeera

Shah Rukh Khan talks success and having two left feet

Bollywood star Shah Rukh Khan has told BBC Talking Movies’ Tom Brook about his accomplishments, his recent career misfires and his legacy.

Asked about what he wanted his legacy to be for future generations Khan said he wanted to pass on a culture of “immense hard work with a lot of humour and without trying to feel that you work hard.”

“Wear your success like a T-shirt not like a tuxedo,” he added.