After Strictly’s Ore Oduba admitted he had suffered from an addiction to porn for 30 years, Josh Lane, 26, tells how he, too, became hooked on adult content – and the devastating impact it had on him
Josh Lane, 26, from Aylesbury, Bucks, became addicted to porn, aged 12, and by 15 was watching it for two hours every day.
He says: “I was in year seven at secondary school and a friend asked if I’d seen any porn. I went home and searched for it on my iPod Touch. Within seconds I found myself on a mainstream porn site, watching hardcore content. It was like opening Pandora’s box.”
Josh is speaking out in the wake of Strictly’s Ore Oduba’s admission that he first watched porn aged nine, and had suffered a 30-year addiction to adult content.
Oduba, 39, a father-of-two, who split from wife Portia in 2024, admitted to first watching adult content when he was nine and hiding his addiction from people close to him.
A new poll from the Children’s Commissioner, in which 70% of respondents said they had seen porn before they reached 18 – up from 64% in 2023 – shows he is not alone.
A quarter of those asked had seen it by the age of 11 – with a sharp rise in people seeing it accidentally on social media.
Josh, a youth leader at a local church, says he quickly became addicted.
“I consumed pornographic stories, pictures and videos,” he says, admitting to pleasuring himself.
He adds: “It felt good and I would keep chasing that high. I’d watch porn at night when I was supposed to be asleep. In the morning I would be tired and unable to concentrate at school.”
Josh kept his addiction secret from friends and family.
“I felt guilty and withdrew from those around me. I held everyone at arms length in case they found me out,” he says.
“It was a downward spiral. Because I wasn’t getting the intimacy I needed in my day to day life, I turned to porn even more. If all your pleasure is coming from porn, all the rest of your life feels dull.
“At my worst, at 15, I was watching it for at least two hours a day. I didn’t have any real friendships – I gave all my time to porn.
“I began to hate what I saw in the mirror too.
Hating everything from his skinny physique to the size of his penis, he adds he was “nothing like the men I saw on screen.”
Admitting that his addiction continued into adulthood, Josh continues: “I tried to stop, even telling my parents about it. They took away my phone at night to help, but I’d wait until they and my sisters were asleep and steal theirs to watch porn.
“Into adulthood, my habit destroyed romantic relationships, first because I was emotionally unavailable – too busy hiding my addiction from them – and then when I opened up, because they felt they could never measure up to the pleasure I was getting from watching porn.”
But in 2023, Josh began a relationship with family friend Jordi, 23, who is currently unemployed for health reasons, and in 2024 they married.
“Jordi has been incredibly supportive. Until last year I continued to struggle with porn consumption. A turning point came when she went away on a short trip. While she was there I watched porn. It was so painful telling her that I vowed there and then to stop.”
Josh, hasn’t watched porn now in over a year.
He says: “I’m tempted, of course. But I’m incredibly proud to be free from porn. When I’m not consuming porn it’s like night and day – I’m much more pleasant to be around, I feel lighter.”
And he’s keen to open up the conversation around addiction, like Ore Oduba.
“It’s amazing Ore has spoken out about his experience – there is life after porn addiction.”
While experts feel that 2023’s UK Online Safety Act has helped enforce age limits for adult content, to a degree, they feel more needs to be done.
Emma Motherwell, of the NSPCC, says: “Parents need to look for unexplained changes in [children’s] behaviour. Have they become withdrawn? Are they more secretive about their online usage? Be curious, rather than furious, and keep an open dialogue with your child about what they might see online.”
Cat Etherington, Director of Recovery at Naked Truth, says: “Very early exposure to pornography, especially when that exposure is unexpected or coerced, can lead to hypersexualised behaviour or curiosity beyond their age; avoidance or disgust around anything sexual; nightmares, anxiety, or intrusive imagery; dissociation or guilt about what they saw.
“Potential impacts include confusion, shame; unrealistic scripts about bodies, consent, and intimacy; and desensitisation to violence if the content is degrading.”
And parenting expert Kirsty Ketley warns: “Viewing pornography at a young age can affect a child’s emotional development, shaping unrealistic expectations of intimacy and body image. “Over time, compulsive viewing can desensitise them to real connection, create shame, secrecy and anxiety, and impact future relationships.”
*Amelia is part of LADbible’s For F**k’s Sake campaign – Partnering with Fumble, Movember, Pivotal, and Jordan Stephens – which addresses the gap between porn and real-life sex, aiming to support young adults’ healthy sexual understanding
READ MORE: Ore Oduba reveals rock bottom that led him to finally get help for 30 year porn addiction
Source: Mirror
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