Columnist Jessica Boulton’s rundown of the past week in showbiz: From Strictly Shirley’s heartbreak lessons to Meghan Markle’s latest faux pas and Loose Women’s own goal
Shirley Ballas is used to making big, bold moves on the dancefloor. But now it turns out she’s no stranger to making them in her love life too.
The Strictly Come Dancing head judge has scored herself some impressive headlines this weekend after finally opening up about her mystery split with toyboy-of-six-years Danny Taylor, 51. The pair had first met while doing in Jack and the Beanstalk in 2018 – and fans had been convinced a wedding was in the stars. (Even Shirley seemed sure at one point – as she had already bought the engagement and wedding rings).
However just a day after her 64th birthday last September, Shirley suddenly told Danny to Foxtrot Oscar for good. Fans have since been speculating to what could possibly have happened, to prompt such a dramatic exit.
But after Shirley finally shared her side of the story today, there’s not much debate. In fact if his actions were being scored by the judges, I imagine this is what he would have got:
So what did her hunky toyboy allegedly do to be sent quickstepping away? It wasn’t his red flags – she admitted she ignored far too many of them. It wasn’t that he was scatty, sometimes vague and disorganised; that they would row, sometimes for days; or that she spent a small fortune showering him with gifts, either.
And it wasn’t – even though it really should have been – the day he straight up Han Solo-ed her grand romantic gesture. Just like Princess Leia to Han in Empire Strikes Back, Shirley apparently once told Danny she loved him. And just like Han, Danny gave a colder-than-planet-Hoth riposte: “I know”.
No. Despite all that, there was only one thing that could finally end their push and pull, Paso Doble of a relationship. And it was the (alleged) actions of a man who perhaps should have known better.
Apparently it was Shirley’s birthday, he’d gone away to see friends and she had been out with her mum (who lives with her). But then Shirley got a call from his friend, to say Danny had disappeared, his phone was off and they were ‘worried’ about him.
For Shirley and her mum, it was an immediate flashback to their night of fear of 2003, when her brother David disappeared before taking his own life aged 49. The two women were frantic – until, at some point in the late early hours, Shirley saw Danny had finally read her WhatsApp message.
You don’t need to be a psychologist to guess why Shirley was so affected. And while Danny was never at risk, in Shirley’s mind, he should have realised how his actions might trigger her worst fears. Danny has yet to respond to Shirley’s claims or explain his side of the story. But whatever happened, Shirl decided to don her head judge hat and send him packing.
So what is it that us that singles of a certain age can learn from Shirley’s heartbreak? Well, fast forward a year and she’s talking a lot of sense. Her new book Best Foot Forward is all about her life lessons. But just from her experience Danny alone, there are clearly four key things anyone solo and over 40 should take on board.
1. Don’t panic about being single and settle. You can date in your 50s, 60, 70s, and beyond. (Or not, if you prefer). But don’t ignore red flags through fear of being alone. “There was no question about how much I loved that man,” Shirley says. “[But] Along the line, there were red flags that I chose to ignore.” As she should know from the Paso (the Latin dance based on bullfighting), you always have to face the music eventually. She adds: “[Then] It just got to a point where the relationship was becoming too difficult for me in many ways.”
2. At different times in life you need different things from a relationship. Shirley says: “I don’t think I’ll ever have another relationship, but if I did, it would have to be with somebody that was much more calm and saw us growing in the same direction.”
3. Don’t regret a relationship just because it didn’t work out. Shirley knew when they’d danced their last dance – but she didn’t regret all the ones before. “I just didn’t really have a choice [to end it]”, she explains. “It doesn’t mean those six years I had with Danny, I didn’t adore him”.
4. And finally – and this is my favourite one – be HONEST about what you want – and don’t apologise for it. This might be the one area where Shirley might need a bit more work. Why? Because Shirley made a vow today: “I think my ‘toyboy’ days are behind me,” she said. Only to then reveal her new target age bracket. “I reckon anything from 55 to 70 if they’re fit,” she said.
Yep, you read that right. Shirley, 64, is cutting the toyboys…… by making 55 her new minimum age requirement. So, either I’ve been doing maths wrong for ever…… Or she just needs to just own the fact she loves a younger man. To be fair, if I looked as fab-u-lous as her, I’d be trying to cha-cha-charm them too.
Shirley’s not the only showbiz news that’s been raising an eyebrow or two this week. Plenty of other celebs have been getting us twittering. And where better to start than…….
THE PRICE OF WAR MONDAY
The week began with the latest episode of my very favourite reality show: Katie And Peter. Yup, it may have been cancelled by ITV way back in the noughties, and their marriage may have kicked the bucket back in 2009….
But like Alexis Colby and Blake Carrington, Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt, or Kramer vs Kramer, the fallout from Katie Price and Peter Andre’s break-up was toxic. So very very toxic, in fact, the air could take longer to clear than….well, Earth’s (now climate-change denier Trump’s in charge).
Katie and Peter’s ongoing saga is now playing out over social media rather than on TV – and Season 6,852 opened with a bang this month when Andre threw down the gauntlet by declaring it was time to TELL ALL. (Yes, KP’s done 5,929 autobiographies, but there really is still more to tell.)
With the war of the exes firmly back on, attention has now turned to how their children have been reacting, amid reports of a feud between Katie and Princess, 18. On Monday, Pete publicly praised son Junior, 20, for explaining to fans that he had decided to take time out from the limelight to concentrate on life in the real world.
It was not only surprisingly mature for a nepobaby, but also the kind of self care advice Katie and Pete might want to try for themselves. “Sometimes the most quiet seasons are the most powerful ones.” Junior mused. “When the time’s right, you’ll understand why I’ve been so lowkey.”
Err, Junior, your fans might understand. But Mummy Dearest? She’s never been one for being understated. Indeed, there’s only one way KP could ever be “lowkey”.…. if she borrowed Tom Hiddleston’s costume for an Avengers’ fancy dress party.
MEG-A FAIL? TUESDAY
The world has rarely seemed more divided. And this week we were once more forced to debate one of the most polarising questions of recent years. Nope, not “Nigel Farage: supervillain or, um, just a regular villain??”
But an even more controversial debate: Is The Duchess of Sussex’s baking and crafting Netflix show…. 1. a giant dollop of sugary-sweet, wholesome, guilty-pleasure TV? Or, as one (seemingly sour) critic declared…. 2. “Basic, humourless and nauseatingly-fake”. In other words: An overbaked slice of ego pie, with a sideof brain numb-ery, a garnish of phoneyism and a sprinkle of patronisation?
Yes, the second series of With Love, Meghan dropped on the streamer on Tuesday and early reviews have been marmite, to say the least. It failed to hit the Top 10 in UK or US on Day One, yet at the same time the never-disheartened Meghan has claimed her tie-in As Ever products have been selling so fast she had to order “a million” marmalade jars just to meet demand*. (*Okay, Harry! Fess up! Where are you hiding them all?)
There has, of course, been some juicy bitesize morsels of gossip, peppered in between the toothaching-earnestness of her oh-so-homely show (that’s, um, filmed in a rented house). Apparently smitten Harry was the first to say “I love you” (shocker). Archie and Lilibet use the American names for vegetables – because Meghan does most of the cooking. And poor Megs had a mix up with Fahrenheit and Celsius on the night Harry proposed – leading to a roast poultry disaster.
The latter is deliciously ironic. She burnt the chicken the night they got engaged. But, yet, it was only after Megxit….that their goose was finally cooked.
YOU’RE DREAMING WEDNESDAY
Working for a celebrity is never as glamorous as many think. After all, many a put-upon assistant could probably outdo Stephen King in the horror story stakes. But this week former Voice of an Angel Charlotte Church really took the biscuit.
For she’s been advertising for a maintenance and landscaper to work at her wilderness/self care/new age/wellness resort “The Dreaming” in Wales. The advert sounded interesting at first: “Spend your days outdoors caring for the land, supporting the retreat, and becoming part of our community,” she states on her site.
But then came the kicker….“In exchange for food, board, and time immersed in the magic of this place.” Uh-huh. No salary. No pension. Just a enchanting dinner of veggies from the garden of her fairytale retreat. She is quite literally offering ‘magic’ beans in lieu of cold-hard cash.
Don’t get me wrong, your resort does look like something out of a storybook, Charlotte. But unless you’re throwing in some unicorn rides and a pet dragon, I’ll stick to a spell at my desk in return for the magical ability to pay off my credit cards, thanks.
WANDS AT DAWN THURSDAY
Talking of magic….things got witchy (but with a b) when it came to the new Harry Potter TV series this week.
Chris Columbus – the Home Alone director, not the 1492 explorer – was at the helm of the first three Potter movies with Daniel Radcliffe and co, back in the early noughties. But he wasn’t exactly enchanted after seeing the first pictures from the London set of the new HBO TV series. In fact, he was sounding very, er, Slytherin about it all. So what was his snakey remark?
“So, I’m seeing these photographs … and he’s wearing the exact same costume that we designed for Hagrid,” he begins. “Part of me was like: What’s the point?” (Ouch!). “I thought everything was going to be different, but it’s more of the same.” (Double ouch!) “It’s very flattering for me, because I’m like, that’s exactly the Hagrid costume that we designed.” (Getting a tad passive aggressive are we Chris?). “So, part of it is really exciting…” (Yes?) “And part of it is sort of deja vu all over again.” (Oooh – burn!). That’ll sting more than Kevin McCallister’s aftershave faux pas.
PH-WOAR FRIDAY
Forget Time Magazine’s Most Influential People or Forbes’ 30 Under 30 – by Friday, social media was obsessed with the results of a new and far more important hotlist: The Hottest Actors Over 50.
Naturally it was my journalistic duty to study it in detail, after its release by AARP, the US equivalent of Age Concern. Idris Elba, 52, came top, Pedro Pascal, 50, second, and The Pitt’s Noah Wyle, 54, came third – 30 years after first raising heart rates as John Carter in ER. George Clooney, 54, Denzel Washington, 60, and Keanu Reeves, 60, were also in the Top 10
So far, so good. But I did have one concern – Idris aside, the list lacks Brits. Therefore, as balanced, accurate reporting is the core principle of my craft, I have decided to generously and selflessly take on the burden of redoing this list properly.
It will take many, many hours of unpaid, intense scrutiny (of shirtless Google images), plus days of meticulous research (watching movies). But for the sake of good journalism, I guess I’ll grin and bear it.
*FYI, CHARLOTTE: this is the kind of digging I will do for free.
PICTURES OF THE WEEK:
You could scroll Instagram for hours but let’s face it: we are never, ever, ever going the find a better photo than this one, this week.
It’s the moment Taylor Swift fans never thought they would see: The break-up song queen shaking off her penchant for skinny British Indie boys – and announcing her engagement to her all-American hulk of an NFL player Travis Kelce.
It took mere nanoseconds of ‘Tay-Tay’ posting about this picture-perfect chapter of her Love Story before it went viral. And – sadly – only slightly longer, before things also turned a little toxic.
For Loose Women’s Jane Moore and Nadia Sawalha were a smidge on the grumpy side about the giant, massive, beautiful, diamond ring Travis designed for Tay. “‘I don’t understand what the ‘design’ element is,” whined one. “Because it’s just a great big diamond on a ring.”
Oh, yeah, how truly awful. What a wrong ‘un. I mean, who would ever want the love of their life to give them a Titanic-sized diamond? What a monster.
What was even worse about the Loose Women’s mean girl comments is that they weren’t even true. If they’d actually taken a second to look a bit closer they’d see there’s actually a delicate “T” design on the band.
Perhaps you should’ve gone to Specsavers, ladies. After all, feelgood stories are few and far between. So there’s only one catty remark I want to hear about Taylor’s engagement …. What this guy thinks.
Jess A Quickie
I really hope the newly-announced Knight Rider movie is planning to bring back its original star. After all, he was a leading talent of his generation, a true trailblazer and the hottest thing on screen in the early 80s. Although, I suppose…. If K.I.T.T does win a part, will they have to let The Hoff back too?
